“She’s mentioned feeling like her mom doesn’t have time for her anymore. I’ve tried to reassure her, but she’s… well, look, she’s seven. And she’s been drawing a lot of pictures to process her feelings.”
Clara handed me a stack of drawings, and my heart sank as I flipped through them.
Most were variations of the same theme.
A happy family with Clara in my place. On the back of one of the drawings, there were more words I hadn’t noticed the first time:
Daddy and Clara.
“So, you’ve been spending time with my daughter?” I asked, unable to hide the edge in my voice.
“Yes, of course,” she said. “But only in class, and I’m her teacher, after all.
She stays after class sometimes to help me tidy up. She told me she feels like she’s losing her mom because you’re always busy. I’m so sorry if I overstepped.
I’d never want to interfere…”
I turned to Jack, my chest tight.
“And you? What did you say to her about this?”
Jack looked miserable.
“I found that picture last week,” he admitted. “I told Mia it wasn’t true, that you love her more than anything.
But I didn’t know how to handle it. I didn’t want to make it worse by bringing it up when you were already so stressed out. I told her to put the drawing away because I knew it would hurt you.”
“You should have told me, Jack,” I said softly.
I honestly didn’t know what to think.
Jack nodded, guilt in his eyes.
“I know, love,” he said.
“I thought I was protecting you, but I see now that I just made it worse.”
My anger began to deflate, replaced by a wave of guilt so heavy it nearly knocked me off my seat. This wasn’t about Jack cheating or Clara overstepping. It was about my daughter, her sadness, her confusion, and her way of coping with my absence.
That night, I sat down with Mia at the kitchen table.
I had dished us bowls of ice cream with all the toppings, hoping for a bonding moment between us.
“Sweetheart,” I said softly. “I need to tell you something. I know I haven’t been around as much lately, and I’m so, so sorry.
Grandma needs a lot of help right now, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to be with you. You’re my everything, sweet girl.”
Mia’s eyes filled with tears, and she threw her arms around me.
“I thought maybe you didn’t like me anymore,” she whispered.
My heart shattered.
“I love you more than anything,” I said, holding her tightly. “Nothing will ever change that.”
In the weeks that followed, I made several lifestyle changes.
I cut back on work hours and asked my siblings to take on more of our mom’s care.
Jack and I started a “Mom and Mia” night every week, just the two of us, doing whatever she wanted.
Sometimes it was baking cookies, other times it was a movie night, or building a fort, or sometimes it was just us dressing up and going on a date together.
I also had a heartfelt talk with Clara to thank her for being a wonderful teacher and being there for Mia when I couldn’t be.
She apologized again for any boundaries she might have crossed, but I reassured her that Mia’s drawings weren’t her fault.
“I just feel bad, Amber,” she said as she cleaned up paintbrushes.
“I know, but you really shouldn’t, Clara,” I said. “You became a safe space for Mia, and you reminded her of how loved and cared for she is. That’s something I’ll always appreciate.”
Life isn’t perfect, but it’s a lot better.
I’m learning to ask for help and to show Mia that she comes first. And now, every time she picks up her crayons, I make sure I’m sitting right next to her.
Source: amomama
