I’m (29F) the oldest child in my family. A few years ago, I got married to my now-husband. When we were planning our wedding, I asked my parents if they’d be able to help financially – not pay for the whole thing, just some support.
They told me they couldn’t afford it and said they believed in kids being independent and paying for their own weddings. I accepted that, and my husband and I paid for everything ourselves. It was tight, but we made it work.
Fast forward to this year: my younger brother (26M) is getting married, and my parents are fully funding his wedding – venue, catering, honeymoon, everything. We’re talking tens of thousands of dollars. I didn’t say anything at first, but l’m honestly hurt and confused.
When I asked them why they didn’t help me, they gave vague answers like, “things were different back then” and
“we want to give your brother a head start.” It felt like a slap in the face. Now, they’ve recently hit a rough patch financially and asked if I could help them cover some bills. I said no.
I told them I find it hard to give money to people who clearly played favorites and left me to struggle. They got upset, said I was being cold and petty, and now other family members are saying l’m overreacting and need to let it go. But I honestly don’t feel obligated to help them when they’ve shown such clear favoritism.
I’m not trying to be spiteful, but I feel used. AITA?
