I was ten when I lost my mom, and it broke me. She died minutes after discovering my dad was cheating on her ā a secret Iād been keeping, hoping to protect her. Seven years later, I caught him doing it again.
This time, I wasnāt going to stay silent and watch him betray my stepmother. When I was ten, I learned two things: secrets destroy families, and silence can kill. I still remember the afternoon my mom found out about my dadās affair, just 20 minutes before she died.
Sheād looked at my dad with such heartbreak and fury that it felt like her soul shattered right in front of me. Her hands trembled as she held his phone, the bright glow of the screen illuminating her tear-streaked face. āWho is she, David?ā she had asked.
My dad stammered, his face pale. āStella, I can explain āā
āExplain WHAT? That youāve been lying to me?
To us? Is this why youāve been coming home late? All the work meetings?
How long, David? How long?ā
I remember standing frozen in the hallway, gripping the edge of the wall like it was the only thing keeping me upright. Sheād discovered his affair by accident ā a text from his mistress had popped up while his phone was sitting on the counter.
The message read: āMiss you already. Last night was amazing. Canāt wait to see you again.ā I didnāt have to read it twice to understand what it meant.
What made it worse and what BROKE me was that I knew about the affair a week before Mom did. I overheard Dad on the phone one night when I got up to get water. He wasnāt exactly whispering.
I paused in the hallway, clutching my glass. āI miss you too,ā heād said, chuckling softly. āYouāre the only thing keeping me sane these days.
I love you, Sarah.ā
My heart dropped. I didnāt know what to do with the ache spreading through my chest. The next morning, I confronted him.
āDad, whoās Sarah?ā
His eyes widened. āMia, itās not what you think,ā heād said, but I could see the sweat beading on his forehead and his hands shook as he reached for my shoulder. āThen what IS it?ā Iād demanded, tears threatening to spill.
āWhy did you tell her that you āloveā her?ā
He crouched to my level, his voice dropping to a desperate whisper. āListen to me. You canāt tell your mom.
If you do, itāll ruin everything. Our family will fall apart. You donāt want that, do you?ā His eyes, usually so steady, were pleading.
At ten, I didnāt understand manipulation, but I understood fear. And in that moment, I was terrified ā of him and what the truth could do. Although I wanted to tell Mom, I couldnāt.
Not yet. So I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded. āOkay,ā I whispered.
But the truth has a way of coming out, right? A week later, Mom found the text from his mistress. Sheād screamed at him, her voice echoing through the house like thunder.
āI gave you EVERYTHING, David! How could you do this to me? To Mia?
I hate youā¦ā Then, an even louder, āI HATE YOU.ā
He followed her as she grabbed her car keys, his words frantic. āStella, wait, please. Donāt go.
Letās talk about this āā
But she didnāt stop. I stood in the doorway, clutching my stuffed rabbit to my chest, as she slammed the door and peeled out of the driveway. I felt so sorry for Mom.
And 20 minutes later, she was gone. They told me that her car was hit by a truck as she sped through the intersection. For years, I replayed that afternoon in my head.
I blamed Dad. I blamed myself. If I had told her sooner, maybe she wouldnāt have found out the way she did.
Maybe she wouldnāt have been so angry. Maybe she wouldāve been paying more attention to the road. After Mom died, my dad fell apart.
He stopped shaving, stopped smiling, and stopped being the man he used to be. Iād hear him crying at night when he thought I was asleep, whispering her name like it was a prayer he didnāt deserve to say. I wanted to hate him forever.
But hate is heavy, and after a while, it started crushing me. So I forgave him. Forgiveness was piece by piece until the anger turned into something softer⦠something like pity.
When I was 15, he married Diana, my stepmom. She was nothing like the woman heād cheated Mom with, though I havenāt seen Sarah, who just turned out to be a passing cloud in Dadās life. Diana was kind and warm, the kind of person who remembered your favorite dessert and tucked you in bed when you fell asleep on the couch.
I liked her instantly. For the first time since Mom died, I thought maybe we could be okay. Maybe we could be a family.
But I shouldāve known better. Two years passed, and a few weeks ago, I woke up to the soft click of the front door closing. My room was pitch black, except for the faint glow of my digital clock.
It read 2:14 a.m. Curious, I peeked out the window and saw Dad heading somewhere in the dark. āWhere is he going at this hour?ā I whispered, sitting up in bed.
I tried to convince myself it was nothing. Maybe he needed fresh air. Maybe he couldnāt sleep.
But something about it felt wrong. The next night, it happened again. And the night after that.
Each time, the sound of the door clicking shut sent a shiver down my spine. Iād asked Diana about it one morning. āDo you know why Dad keeps leaving in the middle of the night?ā
Her face scrunched up in confusion.
āWhat? Heās been leaving? No, I didnāt notice.
Iām so exhausted to notice anything at night!ā Sheād laughed nervously, but I didnāt miss the flicker of concern in her eyes. Thatās when I knew. Something wasnāt adding up.
One night, I decided to follow Dad. I waited until I heard the familiar sound of the door closing. Slowly, I crept out of bed, my bare feet padding against the cool wooden floor.
I peeked through the blinds and saw him walking down the street, his shoulders hunched as if he was trying not to be seen. He didnāt park in our driveway. Instead, his car was two blocks away, hidden under the shadow of a large oak tree.
āWhy would he do that?ā I whispered to myself, my pulse quickening. I slipped on a pair of sneakers, threw on a sweater, and followed him. The night air was cool against my skin, and the quietness of the neighborhood felt deafening.
I stayed far enough behind, darting behind bushes and parked cars whenever he glanced over his shoulder. My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it might burst. Finally, he reached his car.
I stayed crouched behind a mailbox, watching as he pulled out his keys. But then he froze. āMia?ā he said, his voice sharp and cutting through the stillness of the night.
I stepped out of the shadows, my face burning with the shame of being caught. He must have spotted me in the carās side mirror. Or maybe my shadow?
āWhat are you doing out here?ā he asked, frowning. His voice was stern, but his eyes betrayed a flicker of panic. āWhat am I doing?ā I shot back.
āWhat are YOU doing sneaking out in the middle of the night?ā
He ran a hand through his hair, glancing around as if making sure no one else was watching. āMia, go back to bed,ā he said, his tone softening. āNot until you tell me where youāre going,ā I said, crossing my arms.
He sighed, his shoulders slumping. āI was going to your momās grave,ā he said quietly, avoiding my gaze. āAt two in the morning?ā I raised an eyebrow.
āIāve been busy all day, Mia,ā he said. āThis is the only time I can go. Itās⦠peaceful at night.ā His voice cracked just slightly as if he was holding back something heavier.
Something in his tone made me hesitate. It sounded real⦠too real. And my heart wavered.
But something didnāt quite add up. I mean, who goes to a cemetery at TWO IN THE MORNING? āFine,ā I muttered, glancing down at the ground.
āIām going home.ā
āGood,ā he said quickly, climbing into his car. āGo back to bed. And donāt tell Diana.
Letās not get her worried over this, okay?ā
I turned to leave, feeling conflicted. But just as I took a step, a flash of light caught my eye. His carās dashboard lit up, and I saw a text message glowing on the screen:
āIām already waiting, baby.
Where are you!?ā
The blood drained from my face. I felt like Iād been punched in the stomach. WAITING?
BABY? I rushed home, but I didnāt go back to bed. Instead, I grabbed my car keys, my hands trembling as I gripped the steering wheel.
My mind raced with a thousand thoughts, none of them good. The cool night air seeped through the cracked windows as I followed Dadās car, keeping a safe distance. My headlights stayed off, and I trailed him carefully, my heart thudding louder and faster with every turn he made.
After about 20 minutes, he pulled into the parking lot of a fancy hotel downtown. I parked a block away, slouching in my seat as I watched him step out of his car. My legs felt like jelly, and I gripped the door handle, frozen, as he walked toward the entrance.
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